Q. My partner is a private person and is uncomfortable about group activities. How can I reassure  my partner that the workshop is safe? A. There are no group activities. The exercises and interaction are exclusively for the couple partners. No one will be asked to say or do anything in front of the group, not even with a group. This experience is for the two of you only. Q. We have a pretty good marriage. Is the workshop suitable for us? A. You will find that the workshop affirms and validates your good marriage plus you will learn some new relationship enhancing skills and see aspects of your relationship from a different and positive point of view. Q. We tried to learn a communication technique but it was just too complicated and does not seem to work for us. How complicated are the skills you teach? A. You may be referring to an active listening skill. It is complicated and especially difficult to use in conflicts. What is unique and special about the Connecting Workshop is the “picture” of your relationship and understanding how outside pressures create imbalance. The skills we teach are quite simple, many of which you probably already know but just did not think to use them the way we will show you. Q. What can I do to get my partner to go to the workshop? A. Share the comments made by previous attendees listed on the “WhatPeopleSay” page. Note that both men and women enjoy the workshop and even find it to be humorous and fun. The fact is both men and women want the best for their relationship and this workshop seems to be a positive and non- threatening environment. The fact that it is less than four hours makes it possible to fit into your busy life. Q. Can I come even if my partner will not? A. Yes, but you need to bring a friend who is willing to learn with you. Your attendance may actually help pave the way for your partner to come next time. You will benefit from the information more if your partner comes. To be quite honest, your partner will not be the first one to come reluctantly. Q. Will this workshop replace our need for marriage therapy? A. No. If you need marriage therapy, you need to find a good therapist. This workshop is not designed to replace marriage therapy. The purpose of the workshop is to teach skills that can enhance your relationship. Q. Is this a religious workshop? A. The Connecting Workshop is informed by and reflects the best scientific research available. There is a large body of scientific research indicating a positive relationship between spirituality and well-being. One unit of information deals with this. We make a sharp distinction between “religion” and “spirituality” (see “Spirituality and Religion” below). This workshop does not teach any religious doctrine nor does it represent any religious group or organization and your spiritual preference, if any, will be as guarded as your emotional safety Q. Is there childcare? A. We do not provide childcare. But make sure to get the babysitter long enough for the two of you to enjoy lunch out after the workshop. Lunch is not a part of the workshop. Spirituality and Religion There is a growing interest in spirituality in North America. This is seen is the number of books, television programs, and movies that emphasize spirituality. Rick Warren’s “The Purpose Driven Life” sold over millions and millions of copies. The Di Vinci Code was a huge best seller and so was the movie. TV programs Oprah and even Extreme Home Make-over are often spiritual and their popularity demonstrates the keen interest people have in spirituality. Organized religion, on the other hand, is suffering from a bad image.  American Roman Catholics are concerned about a several significant issues. Mainline Protestant denominations are struggling and are declining. Islam suffers greatly from the perceived association with world wide terrorism and fundamentalism. These are difficult times for organized religion. So what is the difference between spirituality and religion? Religion is characterized by group affiliation, ritual, tradition, doctrine and rules, a hierarchy of leadership, sacred scriptures and some feeling within the group that “our way is the right way.” Spirituality is an individual’s attempt to connect with something greater; beyond one’s self. Because it is individualistic it defies attempts to categorizes, label, or organize. Spirituality is a universal individual experience; every person wonders about their origin, their relationship with the universe, and the afterlife. Religion is an attempt to codify these universal feelings; Spirituality it the attempt to feel the universal. They are two sides of the same coin. They are frequently interwoven in the tapestry of our lives. Religion still has an important place in the world, but these days spirituality seems to be more important. Dr. Harold G. Koenig, Associate Professor of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences and Associate Professor of Medicine at Duke University Medical Center and his associates have collected hundreds of articles related to spirituality and health. Their book “Handbook of Religion and Health” (Oxford Press, 2001) documents 1200 studies and 400 research reviews examining the negative and positive effect of religion and spirituality have on health. Koenig concluded his mega study with these comments: “We would agree that when mind, body and spirit are balanced and in order, this is ‘true health’—and it is around this common goal that medicine and religion may someday join hands once again—this time on equal footing, each understanding, valuing and utilizing the healing power the other has to offer” (p. 594.). The Connecting workshop is not religious. It uses the best research science has to offer and presents it with a spirituality of love that endeavors to bring balance and well-being into your relationship.

Frequently Asked Questions